Freeing

My husband has told me that when he began his quest for the “Truth” that he whole heartily believed that what he would find is that Christianity and God and the Bible were infallible. He has stated that he was shocked when it all began to come together for him and he began to see that the Bible was in fact very confusing and not at all infallible. To him this answered so many questions that he had as a Christian. The answers that he got from fellow Christians were never good enough and mostly consisted of “just because” and “God always has a plan”. To him and I have to admit to me as well, that was NOT good enough. Why must children suffer so being murdered, molested, sick with incurable illnesses? Why must families lose loved ones to anything other than old age if they were truly Christian, living their lives for Christ. Why were those many upon thousands of prayer not answered? His conclusion because there is no one, or at least the one we know in the Bible listening. Life has it’s own course and pretty much your on your own to make of it what you may. Sometimes I think he’s right. To him this was very freeing. Freeing in the sense that he no longer had to question why his prayers were not good enough, why when he had the faith, faith larger than a grain of mustard seed, his prayers were not answered, I must add mine weren’t either. It answered most if not all of his questions he had as a Christian.

It however was not freeing to me. I must say at first I was so very angry at the AH for doing this. I often asked him and still do at times, how could you do this to me? What I realize now is that he was not doing anything to me, he was only trying to find answers for himself and he honestly didn’t realize how life changing that would be to not only him but me. He has apologized for hurting me and causing so much confusion. He does love me and I him. Something good has come from this. As strangely as is sounds I respect him so much more now. I respect that unlike me he has the fortitude to go against the grain. I respect that he had questions and he took years and months to find his truth. I must start my own quest now, I’m scared what I might find.

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About theagnosticswife

Living in the bible belt, in middle America, with a once Christian husband who has turned Agnostic. I no longer know what I believe.
This entry was posted in Agnostic, Christian, God. Bookmark the permalink.

8 Responses to Freeing

  1. Russ says:

    “Why must children suffer so being murdered, molested, sick with incurable illnesses? Why must families lose loved ones to anything other than old age if they were truly Christian, living their lives for Christ. Why were those many upon thousands of prayer not answered?”

    The reason that people suffer and die is because mankind is in rebellion against God. When a society rebels against the God of life the only thing left for such a people is death and suffering.

    Jesus suffered and died for the sin and the rebellion of mankind. He willingly suffered for you. You and I are as much a part of the reason that people suffer as anyone else for we all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.

    But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.

    • theagnosticswife says:

      People I can see. For the most part we choose to do what we do. We are according to God’s word sinful, however what about the children. They are innocent. And on the topic of children are we all not supposed to be children of God. I would never ever allow my children to suffer terribly if it was in my power to stop it. Why does he not intercede more? These are questions I have. Maybe you could shed some light on them for me.

    • I am earthling says:

      They must find dificult… Those who have taken authority as the truth, Rather than TRUTH as the authority. G Massey
      God is the most harmful of human invention
      No lie can live forever

  2. jhcckkm says:

    Dear Agnostic’s Wife,
    I too went on a quest for answers and found much the same. The questions that I had were either NOT answered at all…or they were answered in circles…like the one above (by Russ).
    Russ claims that horrible things happen because people are in rebellion against god and that the payment is suffering and death – – and YET, jesus apparently suffered and died FOR THE SIN AND THE REBELLION OF MANKIND. Uh…what kind of an answer is that? People are rebels, so they suffer and die…jesus suffered and died for all the rebels…and you are just suppose to overlook the obvious…IF jesus died for all of us, why is there STILL suffering? The answer I usually get is akin to “Well, you just don’t have enough faith” or “If you had the holy spirit, you’d know” – – again, more circles.
    Good Luck in your quest….you will probably have a LOT of days where you are really stressed/hurting….and IF you come out on the other side with the same belief as your husband…you will also likely be ostracized and the like. Stay strong and find like minded people who share your thoughts….it does help. 🙂

  3. morsec0de says:

    “The reason that people suffer and die is because mankind is in rebellion against God. When a society rebels against the God of life the only thing left for such a people is death and suffering.”

    And obviously a caring and loving god will let innocent children suffer just to teach other, completely unrelated people, a lesson.

    Keep searching AW. Don’t be afraid. Just search for what the truth is. You may end up not being happy with it. But you may also find that having the truth is sometimes more important than being happy all the time.

    “But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”

    Is it just me, or is the god that so many people believe in incapable of anything but death and killing?

    You know what would have done a much better job of demonstrating love? The lack of unnecessary suffering and a lot less killing.

  4. Russ says:

    Whoever causes one of these little ones who believe in Me to sin, it would be better for him if a millstone were hung around his neck, and he were drowned in the depth of the sea.

  5. Russ says:

    Theagnosticswife,

    When I was growing up I was the youngest of 4 brothers. My oldest brother did well. He went to college and graduated with honors. However, the next brother in line began to rebel. He moved out at an early age and began to party and destroy his life. Did my parents love one brother more than the other? No. They wanted good for all four of us but when a person is in rebellion they themselves make it impossible for others to help.

    The Bible says that mankind is in rebellion against God and while God has made a way for all of us to be forgiven and to start over, God does not force us to be forgiven. He allows us to continue in our rebellion against Him. He allows mankind to reap the consequences of the choices we have made.

    Suffering exists because mankind is in rebellion against God. The wages of sin is death but the gift of God is eternal life. Because mankind is determined to reject the God of life the only thing that remains for them is death.

    Jesus willingly suffered the death of the cross to pay the debt that you owe. The wages of sin is death. Jesus died in your place, for your sin. Jesus did not die for His own sin – He had no sin. Jesus died to pay the penalty that we deserve. He paid a debt that He did not owe because we owe a debt that we cannot pay.

    The Bible says that if you confess with your mouth the Lord Jesus and believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead, you will be saved. Salvation is a free gift that God is offering you. He can offer eternal life to you freely because Jesus paid the price for your sin.

    But you must be willing to come to Him, just as you are with all of your mistakes and sins, to receive this gift. You can come to Him right now, right where you are simply by saying to Him, “Lord forgive me, I am a sinner”. He will hear that prayer if you are willing to pray it. If you will pray that prayer, God will save you and give you eternal life. He will fill you with His Holy Spirit and you will become a new creation in Him. The choice is yours.

    Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy and My burden is light.”

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