I knew my non-believing fellow blog buddies would have a moral compass even though Christians, including my mother, say that the Bible is where we get our morals.
So of course I paid for the dog food. I couldn’t have seven bucks worth of dog food on my conscious. See I’m nice and good. 🙂
What I did though was take everything home, pick up the kids from school and then go back to Wal-Mart to pay for the dog food. I actually for a split second thought about just blowing it off and keeping it and not worrying about it. After all Wal-Mart has ripped me off many a time. However, I just couldn’t do that. I would have felt way too guilty. I’ve not stolen anything in my life.
When I took it in the store I had to tell the door greeter what I was doing. He looked at me funny and then sent me to a register. The man at the register also looked at me funny, said wow, thanks most people would have just kept it.
Is it wrong that I kind of wanted to say, most people say they are Christian. Most people would have taken the dog food no worries. I am an agnostic/atheist I brought the food back and paid for it. I didn’t say that and maybe it was wrong to think that too, but that did go through my mind.
On another note, I told my mom today that I no longer believe. It just came out in conversation as that stuff it want to do sometimes. It has been a very stressful and upsetting afternoon. I’m still upset, but I will write about it in the next day or so.
I can say that for someone who wants to please others it is very, very hard to go against the grain. Very hard. It makes me want to pack up and move away at times. Anyone got an extra room for four and some animals?
The Agnostic Wife 
Well, I hope it didn’t – doesn’t – cause too much friction with your mom.
And while we don’t have room for your four (let alone animals!) we’d certainly be glad of your sort of company. By that I mean friendly, honest, funny, interesting, who have kids the right age to play with ours – belief or disbelief has nothing to do with it.
I understand what you mean, however my state, my small town, it seems to be a big deal. Maybe I’m the one who feels like it’s a big deal, but not a day goes by that someone does not speak to me about God or that my close friends and family don’t utter his name on facebook or in a text. It is literally every.single.place around here. It makes me so tired of hearing it sometimes.
Good on you. I honestly think it’s irrelevant if we tell people what we are or what we believe. Isn’t it enough if we are just honest?
As for the space: Sure, we got space, if you’re willing to come up to Canada. We got kids too, so you’re covered there.
It should be irrelevant, but sometimes it’s just not.
Also awesome, I’ve never been to Canada! Thanks for the kind words:)
I forget to comment on coming out to your mom. That sounds scary. I’ve found myself on many occasions staring across at the person I want to tell so badly, yet I’m so afraid.
You knew the day would arrive when you would spill the beans to your mother, and I believe just coming out and saying it in random conversation may have been (believe it or not) the easiest way to go about it. It spares the jitters of preparing some kind of “speech” or something of that nature. This still does not relieve the pangs and stresses of the “aftermath” of the words. I hope that your mother sees that even though you do not share the same beliefs, you still know the difference between what is right and wrong! The incident of the dog food is a prime example! I hope the immediate future for you and your family is relatively smooth sailing.
By your previous writings, I do not think that you are the type to skip out on a tough issue… even if it is your mother. I know that you will take this head on and continue to find the truth. However, if escape is still an option, all are welcome here but I do not think we will fit in my cozy one room flat.
Hi rlschofield! Thanks for commenting. You are right I knew that someday the day would arrive and I would tell her. It was easier to just let it flow with the conversation because I’ve tried to prepare that “speech” in my head before and I never could get it right.
I don’t like to really deal with tough issues, but it’s part of growing up and growing as a person. They all can’t be avoided not matter how hard I try sometimes.:)
Thanks for reading!
Good for you. A somewhat similar incident happened with me yesterday. I was checking my time off at work for the month, and realized I had taken a half day back when we had the “arctic blast” just before the Super Bowl,” and that it hadn’t been added to the time off calendar for our department. For a split second I thought about not adding it – “it’s just 4 hours, nobody would even notice anyway.” BUT, just as quickly I decided no, being honest is better because it would help me sleep better at night or something. haha. I’m the person who sort of feels bad when they call in due to bad (icy, etc.) weather or being sick – even if they’re still working from home! 🙂 Oh well. I made the right decision, so did you.
Wow, that must have been pretty intense. Congratulations on taking that huge step. I suppose it’s like “coming out” about anything – it won’t automatically make life easier, but it should help ease things for you in an overall sense. I mean, at least you no longer have to carry around the dread over telling her “someday,” or hide the truth.
I was there person who felt bad for calling in too! Even if I was deathly sick.
It was a pretty intense moment. It still is because I have no idea how the rest of the family will react. In the long run it’s better they know I guess.